I've been keeping a journal to Hen, because that's what I do. I write everything down. It feels good to get those words out so they don't threaten to drown me with their weight. I wrote her this little entry for her first Thanksgiving.
You've taught me a lot about being grateful. I'm a perfectionist. I've always been focused on what could be better instead of giving thanks. To say that mindset has stolen my happiness over the years is an understatement. Then I found out I was pregnant (Thanksgiving 2014) and protecting you became more important than being perfect. Then you were born healthy and wonderful. Hard work begets good things. For the first time I have something I didn't work hard for. You are a gift. You've taught me what gratitude is. Each night I kiss you on the head. Each night I pray for you, your safety, your future and each night I thank anyone that's listening for letting me be your mom. I promise not to take my gift for granted. I promise to love you each day and really be present in each moment with you. Each moment, each smile, each snuggle is special. Being perfect no longer matters, because I have you, I have those moments. Happy Thanksgiving to the girl that taught me what it means.